I must have been around 14 when I often felt that the world was against me—starting with my mother, sometimes my friends, the relentless academic pressure, and so on.

Looking back, I can relate to the 14-year-old me. When you’re younger, it feels as though you are constantly being controlled (or manipulated) by your parents, siblings, school, and even friends.

In your mid to late teens, it feels that if someone is not with you, they must be against you. On one of those days, I woke up grumpy with the world at large, and one thing led to another. My mother chose to ignore me, but my father sat me down and asked what was going on.

My list of woes was long, and it included everyone around me. He probed further, asking two simple but sharp questions: “What’s really wrong?” and “What’s common to all these issues?” The first one was easy to answer, but the second left me stumped—except for my dramatic conclusion that the entire world was conspiring against me!

Papa then told me something eye-opening: what was common to all situations was me and my mindset.

If I kept seeing my life as full of complications, it would turn out that way. While I couldn’t control the behaviour of others, I could certainly control and correct my own.